And again.

When I lost my job at the church, I was heartbroken. I felt as though a dear lover had rejected me. I cried hard. For days. Here we are again. I enjoyed the work I did at Adec more than I did the church. I liked my co-workers better. There was less stress. More sunshine. My time there was only a fourth what I spent at the other, but that's still half a year... long enough to fall in love. But I'm not torn up over it. I'm sad, sure. I loved working there, I loved the dress code there, all the people, how gracious my boss was. But I never fell in love with anything while I was there - with the job, with a hobby, with a man. I have memories in that office, but none that hold any great passion. Can it be that the tragedy of losing the job at the church had more to do with feeling cut off from the memory, the reality of the joys and sorrows I'd felt while there? Is the current tragedy that I spent six months without any passion at all and so had nothing emotional to lose? I might could shed a few tears over that. *Edit* Or maybe that's not it at all. Maybe it was the complete lack of rejection. Not, "We don't feel like you were a good fit" or "I found someone I liked better" or "You failed... but we're too nice to go into exactly why we're letting you go." It was just, "We love you! But we've run out of things for you to do and your department had all of its budget cut this year. We hate that it had to go down this way.... We'll be in touch if anything comes up!"

Exodus

LOL, w00t. Do I have more than one anonymous observer??

For personal reasons, I don't want to post a direct link from here to my new blog, but I'll be happy to respond to e-mails sent to alittledessi@gmail.com requesting that information. :-D

I really appreciate the comment that my blog seems "spiritual," though I'd certainly have to give God ALL the credit for that because without Him, all my blogs would look something like

o_O

Anyway. I'm still posting on Xanga... still trying to find the truth in a world where suffering and blessing go hand in hand.

Be well!

Jessica loves springtime.

no, unfortunately this is not my artwork. i wish....

in midnights, in cups of coffee...

It seems it's May the fifth,
2AM,
Eastern Standard Time.
I can't believe another year went by so fast....

wait... what's an elephant doing here?

what about Xanga?

pros:
smilies
I can see all posts at once, private and public
fluctuating screen size
font size (my beef with this is complicated. just trust me.)
header format
navigation
2 ways to subscribe
the post is visible in the same window when you comment
picture upload
delete
footprints

cons:
it's hard to make it as pretty (but that's probably only because I haven't started using Xanga Themes yet...)
blog archive feature is real nice to have
automatic save (Xanga only has a manual feature that will let you save without posting and if you lose the page suddenly, you will have lost whatever you didn't save... and it will be posted prematurely. so... if this happens a lot, set it to private until you're ready to post. big deal.)
RSS feed for the comments


stuff I thought I'd like better about Blogger:
"only sign in once to get to my e-mail, RSS, and blog." well, they've taken the blogger link off of the Google links header. plus Xanga is letting me stay signed in even when I open a new window (they didn't used to) and I only have to click once to get to my home page. Blogger requires two clicks (or three, plus search and error time, if you're trying to get there just with the Google links). I mean, big deal right? but it's frustrating to me somehow.
"easy side page elements." not any easier than it is to enter the html in the Xanga Look and Feel box. plus Xanga has that same feature, again, in the Themes department that I haven't gotten into yet.
"attractive format." sure, but I can't tweak it without a technological pick and shovel. Xanga lets me in on the action and I can change the look in subtle ways as per my preference.
"RSS feed." yeah, Xanga's got that too, now.


I think it just depends on the user's individual needs and preferences. Personally, I'm thinkin' Xanga.